Speaking your Second Language

A lot of people do not realise this but English is not my first language. It's a language I used daily to communicate with other non-Malay speakers and it is the working language of Singapore.

But it's not my first language.

I'm sure there is a linguistic definition of "first language". But I consider both Malay and Indonesian as my first languages. Those were the languages I was spoken to, exposed to, grew up with and primarily used in my home environment. English was something "foreign", something spoken outside the home - at school, at work, anywhere else that's not home.

So it came as a surprise that I ended up with a man whose second (maybe even third or fourth) language is English. And in a twist of fate, we speak mostly English at home now. Yay?

It's pretty amusing, actually. We sometimes forget a word in English, or have never used English in specific contexts (like medical, or banking). It gives us a chance to use our own language and learn from each other.

(In our house, we speak a collective of 9 languages: English, French, Malay, Indonesian, Algerian Arabic, Spanish, Japanese, Singlish, a very tiny bit of Mandarin)

I asked my husband once if it disturbed him to speak English so much in the house. He was a bit taken aback by my question, considering we have spoken to each other in English since we met two years ago. I guess I was a little concerned after watching this scene from Emily in Paris:

Gabriel and Emily have their own share of narcissistic behaviours and problems but I thought the crash out was valid. I told my husband that if he hadn't spoken an ok level of English, we wouldn't have gotten married. I don't think I have the linguistic skills to be in an intimate relationship with a person who primarily speaks French.

Some people can do it. I mean, we must all have seen clips of 90-day fiancé(e) where one half of the partnership can't speak any of the languages that the other speaks. And they have to use a literal interpreter to speak to each other. Wild.

Anyway, my husband - being the positive person that he is - said he likes it, because he doesn't really speak English with anyone other than me, so it has helped him improve his English - particularly his spoken, casual English. He used to speak what we could call "School English". Good for him. Meanwhile my French...

I know, I know. Don't blame him, I have TONS of opportunities to speak it. I'm literally in the environment for it. People pay money to have this kind of immersive experience and I got it for... free*!

*Terms and conditions apply

Guess it's back to RFI, Édito and more...